This week we had to include '...as I looked around...' in our writing.
On a foggy day I looked around - by the way, my name is Ottoline and I'm with my best friend Mr Munroe. As I looked around the world changed into candyland! There were caramel cops, cookie children. Suddenly there was a clear announcement "go into the woods," cried Queen Selestia. At that, Mr Munroe saw a cheeky figure dancing in the fire. "Ha ha, a goblin!" I cried cheekily.
Hi Maggie,
ReplyDeleteI love your alliteration "caramel cops, cookie children." This description, in addition to the mention of candyland, makes me think of a brightly colored scene. But then it turns dark with the woods, fire dancing, and goblin. I can tell you have Halloween on your mind!
See if you can come up with a different word besides "Cheekily" to describe your statement at the end, so you don't use a version of the same word twice in a row.
Well done!
Keep writing!
Jilanne (team 100)